Happy New Year
I’m making preserved lemons today. I love the ritual of shaking the jars, waiting for seven days to pour olive oil over the salty wedges. I like to imagine all the things I’ll make with them in the coming months–Moroccan chicken, salad dressings, antipasti platters, or stirring a teaspoon of the brine into my cottage cheese.
At the gym this morning, I read in the ever-illuminating Self magazine that Carrie Underwood doesn’t really do New Year’s resolutions. She just tries to be her best every day. Puke. That’s good and well if you’re a size 2 millionaire, but the rest of us need some strategies. Thumbing through my journal this afternoon, I tortured myself by looking at my resolutions for the last two years. In 2008, I really went overboard. I had resolutions for myself (too many), and a lot of hopes for the world. I get tired just looking at that list.
In my business–the development and psychology of groups and organizations–we distinguish between technical and adaptive challenges. Technical challenges are the sorts of things you can put on your calendar, and the kinds of resolutions we all need to make from time to time–”Learn some accounting skills,” or “Get life insurance.” Adaptive challenges, on the other hand, are another thing entirely. I can’t put, “Be more contemplative” on my calendar for Monday morning. And even things like “Eat healthier” are adaptive challenges. There’s something in us that needs to grow over time before we can cross those things off our list. And we might never be able to cross them off.
After 2008’s ambitious list, here’s all I could find for 2009:
As the new year approaches, may my heart, eyes, and ears be open be open to all the numinous things in the world.
And this quote from Rilke:
Let everything happen to you; beauty and terror.
Just keep going. No feeling is final.
For 2010, I might copy and paste. If I really understood that “no feeling is final,” what might happen? And let’s face it–no matter how esoteric I get, I still have to make notarized copies of all my important papers; teach Wyatt how to tie his shoes; and make it to the gym more often. Using my preserved lemons is a goal I know I can achieve, though. Chalk another one up for the kitchen.
OK to use meyer lemons for this or doesn’t really matter? And the Rilke quote…wow. Made me lighten up right away - thanks!
Happy New Year, sweetness and puke! I love the combination.
I’m glad you’re in my life in the New Year and a reciprocal witness for the past year.
Love you.
I am so enjoying reading the Archives, but I can hardly wait until they are in “book-form!” Sitting at the screen for long isn’t my thing, and I seriously fear that I’ll drool on my keyboard as I admire all your luscious-looking food. The lemons are beautiful!
Have you seen the movie, “Antonio’s Line?” A wonderful film (Dutch) about family, love, food, relationships. . I thought of the film when I saw your picture of Sue’s table in her garden at Jordan’s party. (Why do I sound like I know these people–see we are all IPOL Family!!)
So nice to come here and have a new post up. It’s such a wonderful way to offset “work”, just lightens the world right up. Thanks.
Maybe I’m the only one that’s going to have to look up the word “numinous.”
But if not…
nu⋅mi⋅nous
–adjective 1. of, pertaining to, or like a numen; spiritual or supernatural.
2. surpassing comprehension or understanding; mysterious: that element in artistic expression that remains numinous.
3. arousing one’s elevated feelings of duty, honor, loyalty, etc.: a benevolent and numinous paternity.
——————————————————————————–
Origin:
1640–50; < L nūmin- (s. of nūmen) numen + -ous
Dictionary.com Unabridged
Based on the Random House Dictionary, © Random House, Inc. 2009.
The gym? Ick. I vote we put our kids on bikes and chase them all around Seward Park 3 times a week.
Pam, I LOVE Antiona’s Line. One of my very favorite movies.
Kelly, you can definitely use Meyer lemons. Yum. Of course, they’ll just be less sour.
Naomi, thank you for the definition! “Numinous” is one of my favorite words, but I had to look it up the first time I came across it in a C.S. Lewis book.
me too, Pam. One of my all time favorites.
p.s. Finally watched this after having had it sitting in my house for months. Me = loser.
Thanks Naomi for the definition, What a great word!… and Pam I am already coaxing Sarah to bind her book. I put an early order in for my bday present, she didn’t sound overly excitied to spend the time doing it, but I’m known for wearing her down. I have 3 months to work on it.
I’ll work on your behalf, and we’ll see what happens. It’s amazing what 3 months of nagging will do.
Would it help if I offered money up front??? Nagging along might not do it, but I’m glad you’re going to give it a shot!
P.S. I want to see Wyatt download a picture of you in your kitchen with his new camera.
Come on Wyatt, please!
Sarah–I was just looking through a Gourmet cookbook last night, where I came upon a Moroccan grain dish using preserved lemons. We just came back from AZ where the streets & backyards are lined with citrus candy (oranges, grapefruit, & lemons) and I’ve been wanting to make something with them. If we had room in our luggage I would have brought some back, because having a tree picked orange is unlike none other.
Your comment about Carrie U. made me laugh for a while.
Love the blue & yellow.
Thanks for reminding me to make my resolutions - I’m going for 10 in 2010 =)
I have a jar of preserved lemons in the fridge right now. I made them to use and give to my sister. Since I am always on the lookout for new food to try. Could you suggest a recipe or two to try? Thanks.
the rilke quote is a beyond perfect description of 2009 for me. Some of the best of last year has involved me borrowing my sister’s friends. it’s been such fun work
You can borrow me anytime, Kaitlyn
Ok, so you all know I’m not so much about thinking subtly.
So when I read: “As the new year approaches, may my heart, eyes, and ears be open be open to all the numinous things in the world.”
It sounds to me a lot like: “She just tries to be her best every day.”
But your version has big words and stuff.
You’re right! Guess I have more in common with Ms. Underwood than I care to admit. Now if I can just get the size 2 thing going…
There are worse things than being like Carrie Underwood.
My goal IS to be my best every day. That is, the best I can reasonably expect from myself that day, which is going to be less than my theoretical best self every single time. I’d say I’m a recovering goal-setter, trying to embrace the idea that being content is not a sin. And while being a size 24 was rough, being an active size 14 feels pretty darn good. Two Schmoo.
I’m not advocating this for you, Sarah, or anyone else. It’s just where I’m at this year.
I’ve never been a goal setter, has to be said. Or maybe my goals are a bit more like this: “Please try not to have any medical bills sent to collections this year.” Or “Please, oh please, let me not have to pick up my child from school from having gotten into a slug-fest.” Numinous-ity is a ways off for me yet.
I know I can reply to your comment since you subscribe to them
Maybe I should have just e-mailed you this question because now I have to remember to come back and see if you responded. Does it have to be either/or…meaning does it have to be numinousity or no slug-fest?
I don’t think it needs to be an either/or thing, but I do think that privilege has a lot to do with how people view their own numinosity-ness. The Rilke quote, for example - that’s how I live most days. It’s how I’ve survived my life. I didn’t need to reflect or do a retreat or read it in a book. It was just a matter of getting through. You. Just. Do. It. I’ve been through more things than most Oprah sob stories or made-for-tv movies, and the way I got through was by finding the beauty and hope to cling to.
What’s more interesting is in defining WHAT is beautiful. For me, it’s something as simple as not being fearful about what’s in the mailbox or opening up a bill that doesn’t say “URGENT” in bright red letters on the front. These are things many people in this country take for granted. Beauty is being able to host a house guest for the first time in years, or being able to hang pictures of my children because I feel like I’m “home”. For me beauty is in knowing my ex-husband couldn’t get my son to finish his homework over the holiday break PROVING that he is actually not a better parent than I am. (ok, that last bit was a bit more “ha ha” than “numinous”, but you’re getting the idea)
OK, what am I trying to say…
For many of us who struggle, I mean really struggle (and I don’t just mean financially here), we don’t need a new year’s resolution that says “may my heart, eyes, and ears be open be open to all the numinous things in the world”. It’s just how we live our lives. We need to keep our eyes open, or we’d be god-awful-miserable all the freaking time. And maybe some people think that I am just that miserable all the time. But trust me, I could be a zillion times worse.
p.s. I’m not advocating that people find some sense of desperation in order to have an intrinsic numinous quality. I’m just saying that each of us defines our beauty in different ways, and that for some of us it’s a survival technique as opposed to a place of enlightenment.
“I do think that privilege has a lot to do with how people view their own numinosity-ness.” I really agree with this, Priya. I don’t think you give yourself enough credit when you said first that numinousity is a ways off for you or when you say it’s just how you live. It still takes effort, I still believe it’s a choice. Looking forward to continuing this conversation over Scrabble.
This is a Two Schmoo echo from a formerly size 22, active size 18, would love to be size 14 again. Love your putting it out there Naomi.
First, two thumbs up for the preserved lemons. I have a jar of those in my kitchen as well - yay for Moroccan chicken and pilaf dishes!
Second, another two thumbs up for doing resolutions. It seems a token thing to do these days, but I think it’s a really good way to measure your progress in life. I know that sounds odd, but it seems so many people just go through life doing the same things over and over - and then wonder why their lives are dull and boring and not where they want them leading. Resolutions are active changes - necessary! Challenging! Fun!! Good for you, Sarah, and good luck! Happy 2010 to you and your family!
Sarah,
Thank you for the reminder of Rilke’s words to live by. I needed it greatly–along with the sound of your voice when reading your words. Happy New Year. Lisa